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JudgyBitch

The radical notion that women are adults

Ladies, you can be hot this Halloween without dressing like a whore!

By 5 Comments

What is up with all the slutty Halloween costumes?  First of all, they are ugly. They are also unimaginative, lame and retarded.  Slutty cop?  Really?  That’s the best you got?  Slutty sluts everywhere.  It’s not just crass and stupid, it’s boring!

How about some inspiration for costumes that are totally hot, super badass and utterly sexy without being the slightest bit slutty.  Ready?  Okay.

Holy fucking Borg Queen!  This would probably be quite a bit of work, but smoking?  Oh yeah!

Oh hello Ripley!  Nice guns!

Sarah!  Have you met Ripley?  Let me introduce you.  I think you two will get along.

Come and join us, Lara Croft.  Fuck, you have big breasts!

Aww.  Who doesn’t like dressing like a Princess?

Hello Nurse!  Now this is how you do a nurse.  I like your Vulcan, too!

Who wants to kill a vampire?  Me, me!  I do!

Katniss Everdeen?  Yes please!

It’s G.I. Jane!  Don’t fuck with her!

And let’s not forget our favourite little badass, Lisbeth Salander.  So many variations to choose from.  All fabulous!

What do all these costumes have in common besides their utter and complete awesomeness?  They are all portraits of strong, sexy, kickass women and you seriously better have your shit together before you decide to chat up the chick wearing one of these outfits.  That’s the thing about dressing like a stupid, slutty whore.  YOU WILL GET TREATED LIKE A STUPID SLUTTY WHORE!  Oh I know.  You can blame men because they’re just sexist pigs.  Or you know, you could try NOT DRESSING LIKE A WHORE.

JudgyBitch will be wearing one of these costumes for Halloween.  And she will be spectacular!  There are options, ladies.  Pick one.  Please.

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  • FromMars

    I realize that this was posted about a month ago, but I only just found out about this blog yesterday. I have to say that I 100% agree, there are bajillions of options for looking women to look sexy on Halloween that don’t make them look like whores. Not to mention that I bet the women in the pictures of the ‘slut’ costumes had those things tailored to them and then the imaged was photoshopped on top of that to sell those costumes. Generally speaking I happen to think that any female character who carries around some instrument of war and mayhem is pretty sexy, the bigger the better usually.

    • Yep. JudgyBitch was Lara Croft and it was way hotter than any stupid slut costume. Say it with me: thigh holsters!

  • Anonymous

    those costumes are pretty much the closest a giant handful of guys will get to being able to see all of a woman’s body without the internet or using the energy to sweet talk them into bed

    -sincerely,
    a guy who likes whores
    (i guess you can blame the guys on this one then)

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  • Erik Norén

    A year old but someone gave me the idea to read the archive and i wanted to comment.

    Until i get older and more bitter (after getting off my butt and getting to some parties maybe) i am going to assume the women dressed as slutty Xs are doing it because they enjoy being looked at and are matute enough to handle it. And i’m going to enjoy the idea that women actually dress like such.