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Most women don’t kill their babies and leave them in dumpsters. Most men don’t rape drunk women, even while drunk themselves. So why are men taught NOT to rape, but women aren’t taught not to kill? I call bullshit.

9 Apr

 

 

free

 

Way to go, Canada!  Men’s human rights activists are back in the news in Canada for another “offensive” poster campaign in which all women are painted with a brush that applies to only a few women.

 

Sound familiar?

 

The poster not only highlights the utterly insulting absurdity of the original “Don’t Be That Guy” campaign, but also points to a legally enshrined form of discrimination against men in Canada:  only female persons can be convicted of the crime of murdering their newborn children, and just to rub a little salt in the wound, the poor wee dears are not to be sentenced to anything exceeding five years.  The babies, of course, are sentenced to death regardless of their gender, but that’s such a trifle, no?

 

poster

 

What happens in Canada if a male person kills his newborn? Well, first of all, it rarely happens.  Male persons are significantly less likely to kill newborn infants than female persons, when the child is less than 24 hours old. Once the baby survives the first 24 hours, then male persons are slightly more likely to kill the child. Regardless of how old the child is, as long as Cupcake can prove she “has not fully recovered from the effects of giving birth to the child and by reason thereof or of the effect of lactation consequent on the birth of the child her mind is then disturbed“, she can be sentenced to no more than five years.

 

Obviously men don’t lactate, but are their minds disturbed by the birth of a new child?  The law says “fuck you we don’t care if you have a penis and kill a baby you are going down”.  Science says, well, actually, men do undergo some fairly dramatic and measureable hormonal changes following the birth of a child, and if hormonal changes are mitigating circumstances that permit female persons to be convicted of the lesser offence of infanticide, then why aren’t those changes used to explain why male persons might kill newborn babies?

 

Misandry? Actual, literal discrimination on the basis of gender alone? Pffft. It’s not a real thing.

 

But let’s get back to those posters.  The original posters were intended to urge “men to heed their consciences and not take advantage of incapacitated or unwilling partners”. But do men do this?  What is the evidence?

 

Oh darn.

 

When researchers at the University of Toronto and the University of Washington observed young people’s behavior in bars, they found that the man’s aggressiveness didn’t match his level of intoxication. There was no relationship.

 

So wait, you mean men can get fully and completely loaded, just shit-faced drunk and they still won’t rape anybody?  Well my heavens, how can that be?  Who, pray tell, is doing all this raping then?

 

Sexual predators deliberately target intoxicated victims.

 

Sexual predators?  You mean rapists?  You mean it’s rapists who rape women and not just random guys in bars who have had too much to drink?

 

Don’t Be That Guy – a behavioural marketing campaign sends the message that sex without consent is sexual assault. We are sending a visual message to men between the ages of 18 and 25, graphically demonstrating their role in ending alcohol facilitated sexual assaults.

 

Men between the ages of 18 and 25?  And where is your evidence that men between the ages of 18 and 25 are particularly prone to alcohol facilitated sexual assaults?  According to RAINN, the average age of a rapist is 31 years old.

 

You’re not even aiming at the right target, assholes.

 

And even if you were in the right ballpark demographically, it still wouldn’t excuse the accusation that every male person in the demographic needs to be learned up about how not to get drunk and rape, because most men aren’t rapists. Even the wingnuts at Occidental College agree that most rapes on college campuses are committed by serial rapists.

 

So explain to me again why all men between the ages of 18-25 should be smeared with the rapist label and treated as if they are latent monsters who only need that one last Budweiser to release the Great Rape Monster lurking within their twisted, maimed pathetic male person souls?

 

What would the reaction be if we treated all women as baby killers until they prove otherwise?  What would it be like to have every prenatal healthcare clinic feature posters reminding women not to murder their babies?

 

Disgusting.

Cruel.

Demonizing.

Unfair.

Some might call it hate speech. 

 

 

Personally, I’m not a big fan of the whole concept of hate speech.  The legal definition of hate speech in Canada focuses on the effects, rather than the intention of the speaker, which is all fine and dandy.

 

“The repugnancy of the ideas being expressed is not sufficient to justify restricting the expression, and whether or not the author of the expression intended to incite hatred or discriminatory treatment is irrelevant. The key is to determine the likely effect of the expression on its audience, keeping in mind the legislative objectives to reduce or eliminate discrimination,” they decided.

I prefer a much more simple remedy to hate speech.

 

holla

 

Go ahead and put up your shitty, hateful, factually inaccurate posters about rape.

 

But understand this:  What goes around?

 

It comes around, too.

 

karma

 

Lots of love,

 

JB

 

 


Five rights feminism delivered for women, but doesn’t want to share with anyone else

22 Jan

greedy

Modern feminism, with its incessant whining and complaining and victim proclamations has quite rightly come under increasing fire not only from sites like this one, but in the mainstream media, too.

The recent brouhaha surrounding Jezebel placing a $10 000 bounty on Lena Dunham’s head, demanding to see the unretouched photos from her recent Vogue shoot, serves as an illustration of just how far feminism has strayed from its original roots.  In a fit of mean-girl spite to make Regina George herself blush, Jezebel was absolutely positive that Vogue had grossly retouched Dunham, because there is no way she is actually that pretty.  Lena is ugly!  Let’s prove how ugly that bitch is!  Someone get me the unretouched photos, stat!  Here’s $10 000 for the favor.

Charming. Turns out Vogue hadn’t retouched Lena all that much, and Jezebel ended up looking like exactly the group of bitter, jealous cunts they are. And “good, it’s about time” is all I can say to that.

With feminism seeming to be on a self-destruct cycle all of its own, I thought this might be a good time to reflect on the good things feminism has accomplished and then ponder just why it is that feminism doesn’t want those gains to be extended to everyone?

Could it be that feminism isn’t about equality at all, but more about power and dominance?

Let’s investigate.

1. The right to reproductive freedom

Margaret Sanger and Otto Bobsein are credited with coining the term “birth control” and were early proponents of the wide spread adoption of family planning.

By the 1960s the birth control pill was available for women and unleashed a social revolution that broke the bonds between sex and reproduction. The ability to choose motherhood yet still have sex offered women a freedom that had never been possible for all of human history, and women took full advantage of that freedom. Freedom given to them by mostly male scientists, by the way.

Women had the children they wanted, when they wanted them.

The 1973 Roe vs. Wade Supreme Court Decision further solidified women’s reproductive rights, allowing them to abort children they did not want before they were born.

Recent attacks on abortion rights are rightly seen as an affront to womankind itself.  The right to choose parenthood is absolutely essential if women are to realize their full human potential.

That is not a statement that is contested with any vigor by feminists.  Planned parenthood.  There can be no other way.

Curious, then, that the push to make parenthood a choice for all humans is resisted by feminists specifically.  Amanda Marcotte, writing for The Raw Story is completely dismissive of that half of humanity which would also like the right to choose parenthood.

There are absolutely writers who question why feminism appears to be concerned only with women’s choice, but few will venture further than curiosity.

What is it about feminism that insists women must have the right to summarily confiscate male assets while retaining the absolute right to choose for themselves whether they will dedicate any resources at all to parenthood?

Equality seems to have gone missing from the argument.

2. The right to have rape taken seriously

Caveat:  let’s keep in mind that raping white women, or even the allegation of having done so, was always a serious crime when the defendant happened to be a black man.  It was generally punishable by death.

In 1793, 17-year-old Lanah Sawyer was pushed into a brothel and raped by a seemingly respectable man who had taken her for a walk in the streets of New York. In court, her assailant’s attorney said she had basically consented to sex when she agreed to go walking with him, and warned the jury against placing “the life of a citizen in the hands of a woman.” The man was acquitted.

By the 1970s, the National Organization for Women was busy drawing attention to the leniency most rapists received and the brutal questioning victims were forced to endure.

The Oscar-winning film The Accused, starring Jody Foster as a drunk woman who was gang-raped on a pool table as bar patrons watched was a watershed moment that convinced Americans that rape was a serious crime and that perpetrators deserved to be punished.

The subsequent rape-hysteria of contemporary feminism is not the topic of this post, but I will remind readers that rape hysteria is utterly out of control. As if you needed such a reminder, right?

What I am interested in is the curious phenomena of feminists dismissing male rape statistics and willfully ignoring the fact that boys are raped more often than girls. Not to mention giggling over actual cases of male rape.

Feminism succeeded in making rape a serious crime.  When the victim is a woman.

Why then is feminism so reluctant to extend the same sympathy and legal protections to male victims that are afforded female victims? And just to be clear, I don’t mean sympathy extended by the courts or the general public.  I mean sympathy extended by feminists, who insist that every woman who claims she has been raped must be believed, no matter how fanciful or spurious the claim.

What is that about? Again, it doesn’t look much like equality from where I sit.

3. The right to have mental health issues taken seriously

Anxiety, depression, despair, hopelessness, traumatic responses to events long passed, anorexia and suicidal thoughts were often thought to be the product of women’s innate hysteria, often relieved through the thoughtful (ahem) application of vibrating machines (double ahem) applied to a woman’s genitals (holy ahem!).

Feminists worked hard to demonstrate that women’s mental health issues were linked inextricably to their life circumstances, and rightly so.  Simply dismissing the despair of some women as inherent to women was grossly insulting and reductionist.

Interestingly enough, our modern feminist sisters have no problem claiming that men’s mental health issues are inherent to men and masculinity:  it is the very concept of “manhood” that creates mental illness. Describing men as “emotionless dickbots”, Anna North proposes that all masculinity needs is a good dose of shame.

But do men need, in addition, “a positive, masculine gender identity?” It’s something of a strange concept — few feminists would ever say that women needed “a positive, feminine gender identity.” While plenty of women take pride in being female, “femininity” is so loaded with patriarchal expectation that, for feminists, it’s kind of a dirty word. This may not be a bad thing — in fact, I’d argue that “masculine” should go the same way.

What is going on here?  Women have genuine, human emotional problems that are most certainly not the simple result of being women, but mental health problems in men is proof of “toxic masculinity”?

Really?

Interesting.

4. The right to NOT be assumed natural caregivers

Feminists have long railed against the stereotype that women are “naturally more loving” than men, and therefore better suited to be caregivers for small children.

Of course, these very same women hire other women to care for their children when they are occupied with something more important, and are reluctant to even contemplate hiring an occasional babysitter who is male, but we’ll ignore the inconsistency for the moment.

If women have no innate advantage over men when it comes to caring for small children, why then are feminist organizations so opposed to shared parenting and automatic joint custody when parental relationships fail?

What’s up with that? Are men and women equally suited to be providers of care, or are they not?

5. The right to genital integrity

Feminism has worked hard to lift the veil on the grotesquely cruel practice of genital mutilation, but only if the genitals in question are of the female variety.

Indeed, some feminist websites openly mock men for being anti-circumcision, claiming the “intactivist” movement arises because men feel the “world revolves around their dicks”.

As opposed to all those mutilated girls who probably think the world revolves around their vaginas?

Circumcision: only cruel when it’s done to girls.

What are we to make of this curious state of modern feminism?

Reproductive rights, but only for women.

Rape awareness, but only when women are victims.

Mental health awareness, but only when women are affected.

Assumption of natural caregiving ability, but only when the option is to have a man care for children.

Genital integrity, but only for girls.

How can anyone possibly see feminism as a movement to achieve equality between men and women when feminist organizations and individuals actively work to ensure that the hard fought rights their older feminist sisters won apply to women, and women only?

I personally think it’s important to separate modern feminists from their historical counterparts. When we critique feminism, I think we should make it clear that we are critiquing modern feminism.  Some might argue that the current state of affairs is not a bug of the feminist system, but a feature:  that feminism intended to end up exactly where we are.  I’m not convinced that is a productive conversation to have.

I think we can celebrate the triumphs of feminism while being wholly and deeply critical of the limitations.  There is no room left to maneuver in modern feminism.

The rights women have gained for women now need to be extended to everyone. Reproductive freedom, the right to make rape accusations and be given a fair trial, the right to have mental health issues taken seriously, the right to be assumed a loving caregiver and the right to genital integrity.

You won’t find those issues championed at NOW or Ms. or feministing or Jezebel or any other mainstream feminist media site.

But you will find them championed here.

Feminists have completed their work and now have nothing to do but circle their wagons and try to keep others from achieving the same rights.

Well, when they’re not busy calling other women ugly and paying $10 000 for proof of just how ugly.

 

Fuck feminism.  It’s over.

The game is now ours.  And we will fight for every last right.

For everyone.

Lots of love,

JB

Hoax or not, the Boston Serial Rapist has some important lessons to impart

3 Oct

facebook-page-removed

The Facebook page is down, but the story is this:  Boston College runs a “confessions” page wherin people can “confess” to their various transgressions and sins and get some feedback.  A few days ago, confession number 7122 (jeez, those Boston kids must be up to a whack of no good) went up.

bc

The tl;dr summary is #7122 fucked two passed out drunk girls and forced another who was very drunk but not quite passed out.

And he liked it.

#7122: I’ve never told anyone this, but I can no longer hold it in. Being that I am not a very social guy, nor am I particularly good looking, girls don’t tend to flock my way, which can be very discouraging, especially at a time in my life when a lot of self worth is judged based on success with the opposite gender. I always think a girl likes me, but it always turns out that she is just infatuated with my best friend and roommate. I never told him this, but I thought that 3 out of the last 4 girls that he has dated were into me first. Two of them told me that they liked me, and one even kissed me; both of them were just playing with me though, just to get to him. I don’t blame him because it’s not his fault; I just wish that I didn’t have to get hurt by the girls he attracts. Anyway, as you can imagine, this left me rather depressed and lonely. I’ve never had a relationship, and up until college, the only girl I had kissed was the one who was toying with me. During the first few weeks at school, my friend kept telling me about all the girls that he was either hooking up with at parties or hanging out with during the week. Who had I gotten with? No one. By the end of the first semester, all I wanted was a real experience with a girl. Obviously, I wanted something sexual, actually I was craving something sexual, but when I would dream about girls at night, I only had visions of taking a girl on a date, and forming a real relationship. But who could love me? I’ve determined that I am not worth a girl’s time. And you can’t force a girl to love you. Or if you can, I haven’t figured it out yet. But regardless, my story isn’t about love. My story is about sex. My roommate, during the first week of the second semester, brought back two girls to the room. The three of them were really drunk. Being that I had to get up early the next day for a meeting, I decided not to drink that Friday night. Anyway, so at some point in time, my roommate and one of the girls went to her room, upstairs, and the other girl stayed in my room. I tried to entertain her, but she was very drunk and wasn’t being responsive. I told her just to lie in my roommate’s bed and get some rest. When I tried to lay her down, she pulled me closer, and I mistook her motion as an attempt to kiss me, so I kissed her. At first she resisted, but between her fatigue and disarray, she gave in to it. We had sex that night. I used one of my roommate’s condoms, but to my horror, when I finished, I came to the disturbing realization that she had passed out at some point during the experience. Did I just do what I think I did? The thought horrified me. I needed to talk to the girl about it in the morning when she woke up, just to clarify that it was never my intent to do that to her. I just got caught up in the moment. No girl has ever given me attention, so in this situation, I finally was able to get what I wanted. I put her clothes back on her (which was more difficult than you’d think) and tucked her into my roommate’s bed. When she woke up the next morning, she asked me who I was and why she was in my room. She had no recollection of the prior night. I was thankful, because this meant that I didn’t have to apologize. I told her that she came in with my roommate and passed out in his bed around 1 am. She thanked me for being a gentleman, which I chuckled at under my breath. For the next couple of weeks, all I could think about was what I did, and more importantly, how I got away with it. I see this girl all over campus, and she always says hi. She will never know what I did to her. At first this troubled me, but eventually, I became obsessed and almost proud of it. The thought clouded me head… could I get away with it again? Sure enough another opportunity came my way by the end of last semester. At a mod party, I was with a group of friends when one of my friends and his girlfriend both started to feel sick. My roommate was there and was able to get the guy back to his dorm, and I, being the only other competent person in the group, walked back my friend’s girlfriend to her room in 66. When I got her to her room, she puked in her trash can a bit and eventually passed out on her bed. Being that I was slightly drunk at this point, my judgment was compromised, and I did something that I am still ashamed of. I took advantage of her, and what troubles me is that I enjoyed every minute of it. It wasn’t until the moment that I finished, that I suddenly was struck with intense feelings of shame and remorse. But yet again, I had gotten away with it. I left an hour later when her roommate came in. I told her that I was just taking care of her and that was that. Hurriedly, I ran out of the building, but I didn’t go back to my room. I wondered to the reservoir, and in the thickets of a few trees, I cried myself to sleep. I couldn’t believe what I had become. I woke up in the morning to the sound of joggers. Embarrassed and hungover, I trudged back to my room. Over the summer, I sought out counseling, but when I told my parents that I needed someone to talk to, I could never tell them why, so I never got the help that I needed. When I came back here, I hoped that my desires would remain dormant, but we’ve been back at school for a month and I’ve already had another experience, and what trouble me is that this time, she wasn’t asleep. She was very drunk and I don’t know how much she remembers, but I forced her this time. I know I did. I’m scared for myself, and I worry about the girl. I don’t know what I should do. On the one hand, I know that I need to get help, but on the other hand, I can’t help but be driven to do it again. I have these self-consuming thoughts that I don’t think I’ll ever be able to control. What should I do?

drunk girl

Cue the ensuing shitstorm with thousands of ladies realizing “Holy shit that could be me! I have been that drunk and trusted a man to simply watch over me!  I’ve woken up feeling grateful I had a man to ensure my safety!  I’ve counted on men to protect me, even when they had no particular reason to do so! I’ve expected the Knight in Shining Armor to do his sworn duty and stand guard over my drunk, vulnerable body!”

knight

This story interests me for two reasons in particular:

Women’s sense of entitlement to men’s protection

Rapists tend to be serial

The fallout is that a student admitted to writing the post, and he claims it was all a hoax.  Okay, whatever.  Hoax or not, it reveals some interesting things about #rapeculture, no?

Let’s start with this observation: women seem to genuinely believe they are entitled to the protection of men. I’m going to pull some comments out of the Jezebel post on this to illustrate what I mean.

http://jezebel.com/idiot-boston-student-upsets-everyone-with-fucked-up-fac-1440142699

cassiebearRAWRUfortheloveofbeets461L

It’s important to allow young men to act like utter dipshits without consequence, or else the status quo would change. And we can’t have that happening…                Yesterday 12:05pm

Right.  So women can act like utter dipshits without consequence, but men are always liable for their actions no matter what their state of intoxication.  Pass out in a room full of people you don’t know, wake up with your iPhone and your wallet missing, and get called, quite rightly, an IDIOT.

There are thieves among us.  And rapists, too.  Avoiding the thieves requires a modicum of common sense that every adult is expected to display.  So why isn’t avoiding rapists?

loganbacon

But it just seems too convenient that this schmuck had so many opportunities to rape unconscious or semi-conscious women. I don’t think I encountered three passed-out-dead to the world people in my whole college/law school career. Drunk, sure. Unconscious, no. That sounds more like bullshit to me than “opportunity.”

However, there is no question at all that this dude is a total douchebro.                Yesterday 12:11pm

CPR

You really never encountered three women in your years at college who were black-out drunk? Because you don’t need to be unconscious or falling over to be blacked out.

There’s also the possibility that they did remember pieces of what happened but didn’t report it, because unfortunately our society gives women a lot of mixed signals about whether it’s our fault if they were drinking when they were assaulted. Yesterday 12:30pm

These two commenters are debating just how often women are passed out drunk, or inebriated to the point they might as well be.  They both just assume that women in that state OUGHT to be perfectly fine.  They have a RIGHT to be smashed out of their gourds and still be safe.  How does that work?

man

Oh hello White Knight.

CallMeMaebe

Actually, this is the kind of thing that happens, as the author of the article points out, with alarming regularity on college campuses. I was black out drunk a few times in college. Once, I ended up going home with this dude who was friends with the boyfriend of one of my friends. Next thing I knew I woke up naked with semen in my hair. I booked it the hell out of there before the dude could wake up because I did NOT want to see him. I was later told by my friend that the guy’s story was that while we were walking to his place, I told him that I want to have sex and “what was he going to do, say no?” but then I changed my mind so just went down on him and then threw up which was why the stuff was in my hair. I had nothing but the word of this douchebag I barely knew to tell me what really happened that night but I definitely felt dirty and violated and a huge amount of shame. Because at the time, in my mind, the whole thing was mostly my own fault for getting so sloppy drunk. And that’s the message that a lot of young college girls get: don’t get drunk and let your guard down because of course your male peers cannot be expected to control themselves if you do. Yesterday 3:17pm

What’s the inverse here?  Callmemaebe is being snarky and sarcastic when she says “of course your male peers cannot be expected to control themselves if you do”, meaning that she feels she should be free to offer sex to a guy probably just as drunk as she was, decide a blowjob is a better option and then vomit the consequences into her own hair (fucking gross!), and it is the GUY in this situation who is expected to exhibit control.

Control over what?  Why over her, of course.  But only in one direction.  He must never, ever forget his primary duty to protect and guard her, even from her own worst impulses.  He should assume that she is virginal and innocent and WOULD NEVER, ever offer to blow a guy she barely knows.

Stereotypes.  Acceptable when useful. Assume she is a delicate flower in need of protection when it comes to opening doors and you are a sexist bastard trying to keep her down.  Assume she is delicate flower in need of protection when she decides to go full bore slut on you, and you MUST treat her like the delicate flower she is.

hamster

I nearly fell over dead when I read this comment, and poor Valerie came in for a ton of abuse for speaking too much truth, but I think she nails it.

Valerie Rose Carey

There’s been a swing in the pendulum in feminist discourse about the issue of rape, and I understand why. It’s a much-needed correction to the age-old, pervasive victim-blaming that we suffered for so long.

But as a consequence, there also is a refusal to acknowledge the obvious. We DO live in a rape culture. We are surrounded by rapists. So maybe, as a basic, common-sense preventative measure, we should, if we insist on turning ourselves into passive rag dolls, do so only when we are in a safe environment.

This is so fucking obvious. When you drink yourself into a coma, you relinquish all power to defend yourself against a predator. If you lock your door at night, and refuse to leave your purse unattended, why would you insist on your dubious right to dump your unconscious body in a hallway or a stranger’s bedroom? Is your body—your physical safety—less important to you than your money or belongings?

I repeat—we are surrounded by them, everywhere we go. This is fucked up. But it’s REAL. Why is it that so many young women persist in transforming themselves into convenient jism receptacles for any sick sack of shit who walks by?         Yesterday 2:45pm

This leads me to my second point.  Valerie is correct to point out the obvious fact that rapists exists.  So do thieves, liars, con artists and murderers.

apple

We are far from “surrounded” by them, though.  But we don’t have to be surrounded for a few determined “sick sacks of shit” to have the desired effect.

Boston College runs a “Street Smarts” self-defence class focused on teaching women how to avoid and deter the “Model Mugger”, and there doesn’t seem to be any outcry against “victim-blaming” when people get mugged.

Don’t look like a victim

Avoid dark, unlit areas

Travel in groups when possible

Know some basic self-defence

http://newspapers.bc.edu/cgi-bin/bostonsh?a=d&d=bcheights19940131.2.13#

Turn the Model Mugger into the Model Rapist and all of sudden women have zero obligation to protect themselves and should instead just rely on the shielding instincts of men?

Talk about having your cake and eating it, too.  Women will scream from the mountaintops that they are EQUAL and demand to be treated thus, but they still want all the traditional advantages of having the stronger sex at their beck and call.

The 80-20 rule in policing, also called the Pareto Effect.  80% of the problems are caused by 20% of the population. Repeat offenders.  Not a stunning new insight into criminal behavior.  And rape is no different.

Pooling data from four samples in which 1,882 men were assessed for acts of interpersonal violence, we report on 120 men whose self-reported acts met legal definitions of rape or attempted rape, but who were never prosecuted by criminal justice authorities. A majority of these undetected rapists were repeat rapists, and a majority also committed other acts of interpersonal violence. The repeat rapists averaged 5.8 rapes each. The 120 rapists were responsible for 1,225 separate acts of interpersonal violence, including rape, battery, and child physical and sexual abuse. These findings mirror those from studies of incarcerated sex offenders (Abel, Becker, Mittelman, Cunningham-Rathner, Rouleau, & Murphy, 1987; Weinrott and Saylor, 1991), indicating high rates of both repeat rape and multiple types of offending.

http://www.wcsap.org/sites/www.wcsap.org/files/uploads/webinars/SV%20on%20Campus/Repeat%20Rape.pdf

This is exactly why “teach men not to rape” campaigns are so fucking insulting.  The vast majority of men are never going to rape anyone.  Despite being shit on left right and center for their benevolent sexism, most men continue to shield women from harm.  Even harm that comes from women’s own stupidity.  It doesn’t seem to matter.

protect

The instinct to protect women is innate in the vast majority of men, and painting all men as potential rapists is so dehumanizing.  Part of what makes men different from women is their overwhelming desire to protect us, and women in general have that same instinct towards very small children.  It’s a very clever set of interdependent psychologies.  Men protect women, women protect children, and we all survive the cave lion.

It’s called mate guarding.

http://homepage.psy.utexas.edu/homepage/group/busslab/pdffiles/Human%20Mate%20Guarding.pdf

None of which changes the fact that some men do not give a rat’s ass about mate guarding or protecting women and will express that through rape.

http://www.mta.ca/~ogould/FLIPS/Flips5McKibbin.pdf

They are the minority, and they tend to be repeat offenders.

Women are not surrounded by rapists, but it is foolish to expect that there aren’t a few around.  Boston Rapist may very well be telling the truth, and he is on the hunt for the next victim.

So don’t be the victim.  Why is that so hard to understand?  You don’t go through your life thinking every poor person you meet is likely to mug you, but at the same time, you don’t walk through the council estates at two in the morning trashed out of your mind with your wallet stuffed with cash.

No one will have a whole lot of sympathy for you if you do, and end up mugged.

Rape is no different.  Stop assuming every man is a rapist, but at the same time, stop assuming all men are REQUIRED to protect you. Most will. Some won’t.

Make better choices.  And be grateful for all those men who WILL come to your rescue.

knight 2

But don’t count on them.

You’re not that special.

Lots of love,

JB

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